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  • Marilyn Young

You Are The "Boss of Your Dreams"

I hope this finds you enjoying a beautiful day and living the life of your dreams! Shortly after writing you last time, I woke one morning with the clear message to have our next conversation about “you are the boss of your dreams.” The message has been persistent and I will explain the context shortly. But first, let me start by asking you: What are your dreams? Have they come to fruition? Are you living the life of your dreams? If yes, then fantastic! I am so happy for you! You have found the secret to being on the right path! If no, have you stopped to ask yourself why not? Have you taken the time to articulate what ARE your dreams?

While you ponder those questions, let me give you the background on this topic and the title. When one of my daughters was just two years old, she woke one night crying, terrified of the tigers that she thought were in our back yard, and hence, just outside her bedroom window. I tried to calm her down with cuddles and reassured her that “it was just a dream” and that there indeed, were no tigers in our yard. She looked at me with eyes like saucers and bravely trying to quell her fear, she asked, “But mommy, what if they come back?” I remember, that in that moment, I could feel the fear gripping her (which, as I learned many years later, was due to my gift of being an Empath), and I could see in my mind’s eye, several tigers restlessly circling in our yard. If that was her dream, then no wonder she was so terrified! I desperately wanted to take away that fear for her. Kneeling beside her bed and tucking her in, I calmly told her, “You know, you are the boss of your dreams so you can make those tigers do whatever you want. You can tell them to go away.”

Initially she was hesitant. “I can?” she questioned.

I remember feeling the hope start to rise in her. “Sure, you can! You are the boss! Tell those tigers to go away!” I encouraged her.

So, she sat up boldly and taking a deep breath she said in her sternest voice, “Go away tigers!”

“Tell them again.”

This time she yelled looking at the window. “GO AWAY TIGERS!”

“Good job!” Helping her lay back down again and giving her a hug, I reminded her, “Remember, you can tell those tigers whatever you want. You are the boss!”

I sat on her bedside holding her hand as she quickly fell asleep. There were no more nightmares that night and no more tigers. She was in control of her dreams. She could make them what she wanted.

So, let me ask you, “Are you the boss of your dreams?” Can you or have you made your dreams become your reality? We all can, but we all do it differently. Some of us are quick, consistent manifesters and have the joy of realizing our dreams more often than others. Some of us, however, stumble over blocks we find in our way and feel our dreams are never within our grasp. While yet others are not even sure what their dreams are.

As adults, becoming the boss of our dreams is not as simple as it is for a two year old. Children have the beautiful innocence of knowing what they want, believing anything is possible and so, (to quote Captain Kirk for all you Trekkies) they “make it so.” What were your dreams as a child, an adolescent? What are your dreams as an adult? What are they today? What aspirations do you have that make your heart sing? Your dreams can change as you change, as the reality you create changes. As difficult as it is for some to believe, we do create our own reality. The process is illustrated by a simple cycle.

Our beliefs are the foundation for the thoughts that we have. Our thoughts create feelings about whatever we are thinking. Our feelings drive our actions. Our actions create results, our reality. Those results impact (change or reinforce) our beliefs.

For many, as we grow through childhood and adolescence, we have experiences that are disempowering and we are socialized by adults who also are not the boss of their dreams. This contributes to a belief system that includes putting the controls over our lives in our external environment rather than within us. Our limiting beliefs tell us we are not permitted to have what we want or we don’t deserve what we want or it is simply not possible to live our dream. Those beliefs lead to thoughts that steer us away from accomplishing our dreams. Sound familiar? Has your little voice inside ever eroded your confidence even before you got out of the starting block? For example, “I’d love to ___________ but there is no way I could. I’m not (smart, rich, athletic, etc.) enough.” Has it stopped you midtrack and not allowed you to get to the finish line? For instance, thoughts like “This is too hard. I can’t do this. They make it impossible. The odds are against me, I’ll never get there.” To realize your dreams, you need to cultivate the belief systems and the thoughts that support that. Truly believe you can live your dream. Allow yourself only positive thoughts about your dream. Visualize it in detail. The dream is the end game. Have a clear picture of what living your dream looks like. Do not get caught up in the how and when of achieving it. Many people may have the same dream but each person has their unique path and timeline to getting there. Trust and believe that the Universe will show you that path in the time that is right for you.

What is your emotional reaction to your dream? How do your thoughts affect your feelings about your dreams? Do you feel empowered as the boss in accomplishing your dreams? Are you excited, inspired, hopeful, successful? OR do you give that power away to others? Do you feel fearful, discouraged, frustrated, hopeless, embarrassed? Many of us spend a lot of our life in our head, in our thoughts, and we don’t spend much time checking in with our heart to truly express our feelings. A prime example is our response to the common greeting, “Hi, how are you?” What is your automatic reply? “Fine.” “Good.” “Not bad.” Does this actually describe how you feel? It may, but more often it is a reflexive response that we have learned is socially acceptable. We are not genuinely gauging our feelings at that moment. Depending on culture, gender, family history, or the safety of our environment, we can be socialized not to show our feelings or even connect with them. By hiding or ignoring our feelings it can become more difficult to get in touch with them. It is important to check in with how we are feeling about our dreams. A simple exercise to help with this is as follows:

  1. Make your list of dreams, wishes, aspirations as they are for you today.

  2. Write down how you feel about them. This is not what you think, but how you feel.

  3. Ask yourself why you feel that way. Write down the answer. Be honest with yourself –you are the only one to see the answer unless you want to share it with someone. If your feelings are positive, you will be even more fired up to accomplishing your dream. The momentum will continue to carry you forward.

  4. If you feel negative, you will need to look at that feeling versus ignoring it. So, ask why about the answer to #3 above. Write down the answer and again be honest.

  5. Keep asking why to each progressive answer until you feel you have reached the root of the negative feelings. This will give you a place to start working on how to get back on track to your amazing dream fulfilled life. (See Resources below for strategies to working on the blocks)

When looking at feelings, another important area to consider is whether you feel worthy of accomplishing your dream? When your dreams cross your mind, but more importantly, your heart, do you nurture them or discount them? For instance, do you react with excitement and belief in yourself or do you react with “That’s a stupid idea. Who do I think I am?” Let’s turn that around – It’s NOT stupid and you deserve to have that dream! You are you and you are an amazing child of the Universe. If you have a dream then you are worthy of it. The idea of the dream would not have come to you if it were not meant to be yours to achieve. The benevolent Universe/Source/God/Divine/ Creator does not offer us something only to deny it later. It is always working in our best interest.

Once you have a clear vision of your dream and wonderful positive feelings attached to it, you can act to accomplish it, to be living your dream. Are you secure in your own power to act or do you feel you are at the mercy of what others dictate – family, friends, institutions, government? You are the only one who truly has power over your own life. You can control your destiny. You have freedom of choice in anything you do. You may say that you can’t do everything you choose because there are social rules we have to follow. But you do have a choice whether to follow those rules or not. You have the choice to accept the consequences or not. You are a unique being and you know yourself best. You know which choices are best for you. No one is an expert in you, except you. You will know the best actions to take to realize your dreams.

The more you believe in your dream and have amazing positive feelings attached to it, the more the Universe will unfold the path of action before you. In fact, the more you behave as if you have accomplished your dream, the sooner it will become your reality. For example, a common dream is to have an abundance of money to support a comfortable lifestyle. Many people however, find that no matter how hard they try, they never realize that dream. Their lives are filled with constant worry about “not having enough money.” They feel hopeless and depressed and perhaps not even worthy of having the money they want. So, despite their dream, their constant thoughts send the message to the Universe that they “don’t have enough money.” With that thought pattern and their belief, perhaps even subconsciously, that they are “not worth having more “or that they “will never be able to earn enough” will they realize their dream? Probably not! I know this because I experienced this for most of my life. On the flip side, if they believe they are worthy of having enough money to support themselves and behave as if they have enough money already (i.e. stop worrying about “not having enough”), the Universe will open a different path of action for them. They may have an opportunity for a new job that comes with a higher salary, an unexpected refund cheque may arrive in the mail, a regular bill may be reduced, etc. In my case, once I made a conscious effort to stop focusing on my worry about “not having enough money,” it became easier to balance the books. As things became easier, I was grateful to leave the money struggle behind and developed the belief that money would no longer be a problem in my life. How did that turn out for me? Today, even though I am retired and earning less income, money is no longer a concern. It is there for me when I need it. In all circumstances, we still have freedom of choice regarding how to respond to each event towards realizing our dream. We still create our own reality.

Mapping the road to accomplishing our dreams is a simple process. The parts of the process may feel like complicated hard work as you clarify the vision of your dream, get in touch with positive feelings about your journey and surmount, remove or go around any blocks to get to the final amazing destination. What is important to remember is that big or small, this is your dream and you are meant to live it. Dr. Joe Dispenza refers to a three step process.

Today, when I ask my daughter about her recollection of that event, she has little memory of it. There were still other bad dreams that intruded on her childhood but she managed to overcome them by taking charge and “sending them away.” As I proudly watch her on her journey as an adult, I can see many instances where she has been an amazing manifester as “the boss of her dreams.” What she sets her mind to she accomplishes. She starts with a clear vision. She believes she can accomplish her dream and she takes action knowing she will achieve the outcome she desires. As she maneuvers life’s challenges and opportunities, I don’t know for sure if there was a ripple effect for her from learning to deal with those tigers. What I do know, is that it showed me how beautifully simple and how powerful it is to be “the boss of your dreams.”

So, are you ready to be the boss of your dreams? You CAN make “your tigers” disappear and create the reality of your dreams that you desire and deserve. Your Spirit team will be there to support you along your journey. Believe you are worthy of your dreams and that they will come true. I believe that because I believe in you!

Lots of love and hugs,



If you would like to learn more about becoming “the boss of your dreams” here are a few resources I have found helpful:


Dr. Wayne Dyer

Dr. Joe Dispenza

Gabrielle Bernstein

Rhonda Byrne

Esther and Jerry Hicks

If you have the need for some insightful assistance on how to become “the boss of your dreams,” I am offering intuitive counselling and angel card readings online or in person (in Calgary). Click below to book an appointment.

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