Still Learning to Say "No!"

When Spirit brought in the topic for today's blog, I knew it sounded familiar. Looking back, I

found that it is exactly one year minus a day since Spirit talked to us initially about Just Say “No”. So how have you been doing in this past year with saying “no”? Since the topic has come up again it seems that some of us need a little bit more guidance. Or perhaps we are encountering deeper, more complex issues that we need to learn to say “no” to. Last year we talked about saying “no” out of fear, out of obligation, and out of fear rooted in conditioning as a child. We talked about lessons in self worth and responsibility. We also talked about strategies to learn to simply say “no.” Those strategies included acknowledging our intuition and how we respond to it, looking at the bigger picture of the situation, releasing our fears or limiting beliefs, and then simply saying “no.” (To review the previous messages from Spirit read “Just Say “No”) So, what else does Spirit have to say to us about learning to just say “no”? Let us take a deeper dive and find out…

Choosing Our Path Forward

During this year of the ups and downs of our accelerated spiritual growth, we have been provided with many more opportunities to just say “no.” This is our year to connect deeply to who we really are and decide what path we want to take forward. As you know, it is a year of wrapping up - wrapping up projects, wrapping up relationships, wrapping up situations that no longer serve us, even wrapping up a specific stage in our life. As we wrap up and look forward, we have a decision to make about which direction to take. This year, and especially this past month, the power of manifestation has been amplified. Many opportunities are rapidly being presented to us, and we need to make quick decisions about what we say “no” to. Those opportunities may come to us through everyday occurrences, through other people, and even in our dreams.

As the earth's energy becomes intensified, many of you are experiencing frequent vivid dreams. I know for me, many of those dreams present variations on specific potential scenarios of the future. I find myself actually waking as I say, “no not that one,” “no not that one,” “no I do not choose that one either.” In our multi-dimensional existence Spirit is letting us take a peek at what our options are for the future, and we have the power to say “no” to what we feel does not serve us. I believe that as we have done the work this year to dive deeper into getting to know who we truly are we have a better sense of what will serve our growth forward and we can say “no” based on that rather than on fear. Instead of in a dream, some of those opportunities presented to us may arise quickly through flashes of social media, chance meetings with strangers who could open doors, or casual suggestions from friends and colleagues. How have those opportunities come to you? Again, as we tune into our higher self, we will know what to say “no” to.

Help From Spirit to Say “No”

As we look at these potential future directions, we know in our heart we need to make choices every day that are aligned with who we truly are and what our purpose is. The more we move out of our head and the ego and into our heart, the easier it is to discern what to say “no” to and what choice to make. Through our growth this year we have learned to believe in our intuition, in the voice of our soul, and to trust that the Universe has our back. We have learned to listen to our body to point us in the right direction and what to say “no” to. Those feelings become stronger and more reliable the more we trust. And sometimes when we slide a bit backwards Spirit gives us a gentle push in the right direction.

For example, the other day I made the decision to visit a family member who was not feeling well. It was a difficult decision, and I wrestled with saying “no” but in the end decided, perhaps out of obligation or responsibility, to go. I decided to ignore, or at least put on a hold, a message I had from Spirit earlier in the day through an oracle card to spend some quiet time, meditating, and doing self care. Instead, I headed out but as I started to drive towards my destination, I heard the words very distinctly in my head “turn back.” I hesitated but my thought process overrode the message, and I proceeded ahead. As I turned the next corner I heard again “turn back,” this time a little bit louder. I briefly wondered why I was being told to go back but again I proceeded forward. In the next few minutes, the traffic became unusually heavy and congested and as I approached a major turn off, I heard very clearly and loudly “turn back, last chance!” With that final message there was no place for logic. My body took over and I proceeded straight ahead. I missed the turn and then instantly made the decision to take a detour and go back home. I felt very odd. Despite the many conversations I have with Spirit on a daily basis, this was different. It was if I was the observer watching someone else making the decision and following through to turn back. As I was weaving through the traffic back to my house, a picture flashed in front of me of an accident that I might have been in. I thanked Spirit for that split second explanation and was grateful to get home safely. I have no doubt that they were looking after me. It is difficult to explain the visceral response I had to that last direction from Spirit. I think that even if I had wanted to override it and take that turn, I would not have been able to. Have you ever had such a visceral response to advice from Spirit? How has Spirit helped you say “no”?

Saying “No” to the Ego

Spirit also reminded me today that often some of our life lessons like those in responsibility, judgement, right/wrong, etc., put us in a place where we feel we need to control situations or people so that we maneuver the scenarios these life lessons put us in to what we think is the best possible outcome for all involved. Today, my body drew my attention to the fact that I can say “no” to being in control. As the legal decision maker for a loved one’s health care interventions, I was grappling with ensuring they had adequate medical assessments and supports to be discharged from hospital, while at the same time, they were refusing to participate in the process. As I hit repeated barriers to the outcome that I felt was in the best interest for my family member, my right wrist which had been healing quite well from it is

break several weeks ago, started to ache fiercely and became very weak. Suddenly, Spirit gave me the clear message that my body was bringing forward – I was trying to hold onto control of the situation, and it was not serving me. My body was telling me I should be doing otherwise. I remembered that we truly can only control our own life and are not in control of anyone else’s even when we are trying to help or support. I heard very clearly “let go and let God.” So, without hesitation, I told Source that “I surrender.” I stopped trying to manipulate/control the situation to achieve the outcome I thought would be best and trusted that whatever outcome occurred was in my family member’s best interest. As soon as I said “no” to trying to control the situation, my wrist started to improve. For the remainder of the day, I tried to stay in my heart and listen to how source was directing the process. It was not easy, but I realized that sometimes we even need to say “no” to ourselves. We need to say “no” to the thoughts of the ego and get back into our heart and trusting Spirit. Are there times when you have said “no” to the ego? How did it feel?

Say “Yes” to You

As we come closer to the back end of those difficult life lessons regarding obligation, responsibility, and meeting others’ expectations, Spirit will give us repeated opportunities to make sure that we have finally “got it.” Although we have discussed it before, Spirit really wants to emphasize today that we have the power, the free will, to say “no” to what no longer serves us. We are being asked to go deep within and to support ourselves in following through with actions that bring us joy and keep us aligned with our purpose. Through our growth we are learning to shed the obligated responses where we have once felt we had to meet the expectations of others. The conditioning and belief systems around those responses lie deep within us but we are able to recognize them and to release them, to say “no” to them. We have come a long way to release our fears of being rejected or abandoned, of not being valued, or being judged by others. We understand now that those fears are at the root of the reason that sometimes we act in a certain way when we would rather say “no.”

We are also reminded to say “no” to the judgement we often inflict on ourselves. Spirit wants to remind us that each time our gut reaction is to just say “no” to something, someone, or some situation, to pause and ask ourselves “does this serve my highest good?” It does not matter what other people expect. What matters is what supports you and your journey forward. If others choose to judge you that is part of their journey. If others do not honor your decisions that is for them to deal with as long as you honor yourself. Can you say “no” to judging yourself?

So, once we learn to really, really listen and honor ourselves by saying “no,” what do we say “yes” to? Spirit wants to help you understand that we say “yes” to all that serves our highest good. If that is not always clear, Spirit wants us to ask for guidance from our guides and angels, from the ascended masters that you work with, and other beings in the spiritual realm. Spirit wants us to say “yes” to anything and everything that brings us joy and to remember that that is why we are here on this planet having this life's experience. We are meant to feel joy. Spirit wants us to say “yes” to anything or anyone that fills our heart with love and compassion. Remember that we are beings of light coming from a place of love. We are love. Spirit wants us to say “yes” to our passion and to follow it. When we hit some bumps in the road, some challenges, Spirit wants us to say “yes” to the help that is offered to us. We are not meant to do this journey alone. We are all connected. As we accept help, we also help others.

Moving Forward

Spirit is reminding us that through “no” we are creating our freedom. We are free to be our authentic selves. We are free to follow whatever path forward we choose and change direction when we feel we need to. We are free to learn the lessons that we have come to learn. We are free to live in joy and shine our light. The more we say “no” to what is not aligned with our highest good, the brighter we shine. As you do this work, Spirit wants to remind you that you are a forerunner. Most of you are light workers, if not all of you, so you are learning these hard lessons first so that you can support others to do the same. On a global level, as Mother Earth's energy is shifting, entire populations are learning to say “no” to old systems that have trapped us for decades, if not centuries, in lives that do not foster our spiritual growth. As we grow individually so too does the collective because we are all connected. It is now time for the collective to embark on a higher vibrational journey, a journey aligned with our truth as spiritual beings. It is time to say “no” to the old and embrace the new.

So, as you carry on in this year of transformation, take a brief look back. See the “no’s” that

have helped you to say “yes” to something else. See how you have grown and become more aligned with your highest good, with your purpose. See the freedom you have created for yourself by saying “no” and see the new beautiful things in the future that you are excited to say “yes” to. Remember the powerful, beautiful soul that you are and that you deserve a future of “yeses” that excite you, that support you, and that remind you how loved you are by the Divine.

Sending you love and light,

Marilyn

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