This week I have been distracted by persistent health issues of much-loved family members. Being a chronic worrier all my life it seems, but now somewhat better with that, I repeatedly set the worry aside reassuring myself that all would be well. Not wanting to give any potentially negative outcomes for my family any energetic reinforcement with my attention, I would quickly push those thoughts aside with a firm “NO” to my ego and replace them with
thoughts of the best outcome I could imagine for my loved ones. Thankfully, the first incident resolved quickly as I had envisioned it. I am confident that the second situation still unfolding will do the same. Because I was focused on these events, Spirit held off on providing any messages for me to bring forward for you until today. As aways they are brilliantly relevant to what is happening in my life and hopefully are relevant for you as well. Still working on putting that persistent worry aside, I sat down to write with a few topics rolling around in my head. Suddenly a song popped in loud and clear – “Don’t Worry Be Happy” by Bobby McFerrin. The message couldn’t be any clearer, could it? I am listening and taking it to heart. What about you?
The Silent Thief
Do you have things, people, or events that you worry about? How much of your day does that worry occupy? What could you be doing or what did you miss because you preoccupied your time and attention with worrying about something that may never happen AND even if it did happen what good did the worry do? If we spend time worrying about the future, we are missing out on what is happening in our world in the present. As many mystics will tell us, the present is all that we have. So, Spirit is suggesting that we make a conscious decision to not allow worry to silently steal the present from us. Instead, we can focus on and express gratitude for the beautiful things occurring in the present to bring in more of the same for each successive moment so that we never get to that worrisome future we envisioned.
Misery Loves Company
How does your worry affect those around you? When you voice your concerns, do they too start to worry, pouring fuel on the fire of that potential negative outcome? Do others readily commiserate and pile on their own similar worries so that now several have joined the worry wart club? (If so, don’t feel bad – I believe I must have been the president of that club for most of my adult life!) Spirit wants us to remember that we are all connected and that whatever energy we put out has a ripple effect. That is why others jump on the “worry bandwagon.” As the song says “'Cause when you're worried your face will frown. And that will bring everybody down. “
Spirit wants you to know that the ripple effect can provide just as much support for your positive outlook as for your worrisome one. Secondly, Spirit acknowledges that it takes being in your power to set worry aside and focus on positive outcomes and that others enjoy celebrating a positive outcome just as much as worrying about a negative one. If you need help taking the lead to a more positive supportive outlook, ask Archangel Michael to help you release those worries and old beliefs that no longer serve you.
Worry Yourself to Death
A large study done in Scotland in 2012 concluded that “…psychological distress was a risk factor for death from all causes ... the greater the distress, the higher the risk.” (Source: The Herald) They went on to say that the body responds to stress (worry) with an inflammatory response that is the root of many diseases. A larger impact was found with cardiovascular disease. How does the worry affect your body? Do you detect the subtle responses in your body – perhaps a racing heart or churning stomach? Have you recognized how chronic repeated worry can result in stress related dis-ease? Can you make a conscious effort to tune into your body when you are worried to see where that worry is “landing”? What part of your body is most effected?
As we continue to welcome the Divine Feminine energy globally, we can personally benefit from its heart centredness. As we become more heart centred, aligning with the Divine Feminine energy, we are bringing in more healing energy. So, relating to the world in a heart centred way, may be a protection from worry induced disease.
Boundaries and Responsibility
Of primary importance, how does your worry affect the person you are worrying about? Does it put them into fear of the potential negative outcome you are worried about? Does it create guilt because they feel they are a source of your stress? Does your transparent and honest communication with them break down if they begin to hide things from you to protect you from worry? Over the years, worry has taught me about boundaries and responsibility. I have come to realize that no matter how much I worry about someone else, I cannot control
their actions or decisions forever. Their life is their responsibility, not mine. If they have chosen a path filled with certain life lessons and situations to help them learn those lessons, the situations will keep coming no matter how much I worry. If my worry prevents them from engaging in a situation that supports their learning, the Universe will simply present another situation for them. As a good friend reminded me just today, when we step back and release our worry, with regard to our children for example, we see them become strong, independent individuals who can handle the challenges they encounter.
As difficult as it is, when I have set my worry aside and neutrally supported the other person in the opportunity for them to be in their power and exercise their decision making, the outcome has been what it needed to be for them. The most difficult time was when my husband had to decide on his course of treatment for a life-threatening illness. My guides and angels repeatedly whispered in my ear “Guide. Don’t decide.” They told me that my responsibility was not to make decisions for him out of worry but rather to help him access all the information he needed to make his own decision and most importantly to believe with all my heart that whatever decision he made, was in his best interest. Worry would only take us in the opposite direction.
Why Worry?
If worrying has such negative impact on our lives and those we worry about, why do we do it??? I have spent considerable time pondering this as I beat myself up every time I slip back into worry. I feel I can cut myself a little bit of slack though, and you can too if you are a worrier, because worry is a big part of our social conditioning. The Cambridge dictionary defines worry as “to think about problems or unpleasant things that might happen in a way that makes you feel unhappy or frightened.? How often are children told to stop or avoid doing something because something bad MIGHT happen to them? Can you think of how worry might have been first instilled in you as a child? Now of course our parents and I am sure those of use who are parents, have not deliberately set out to create a lifetime filled with worry for us or our children. It’s not anyone’s fault per se. It has just been part of the social structure for some time.
That same parenting model has been reflected in many social institutions such as our schools, religious institutions, health care, media, and governments. The pressure to comply and conform is often created through the fear, worry, or anxiety of the “what if’s” What if I get hit by a car because I ride my bike too fast? What if I get a chronic disease and die “early” because I don’t eat the right food? I am sure you can think of many, many “what if’s’ that create worry for you.
So why worry? Does it do us any good to have thoughts that make us unhappy or frightened? Some may actually respond “yes” to that question with the reasoning that if worry helps us to avoid something harmful isn’t that a good thing? I would like to counter with having those same people consider that perhaps informing people of the potential outcomes of their actions can help them choose an action that would lead to the outcome of their choice. They would not be pushed in a certain direction because of worry but rather would make a choice based on what they felt was best for them.
We might also want to remember that our beliefs, thoughts, and feelings help create our reality. So, if we are worrying about a potential future scenario, we are putting energy into the creation of the outcome we are worried about, simply by the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs we are holding. Ironically, by worrying about something we want to avoid, we are actually putting our focused energy into creating that very thing we want to avoid! As the song says, “In every life we have some trouble, but when you worry you make it double.”
So, why worry? If we can pull back from our social conditioning for a minute and consider something I believe I have probably shared previously but Spirit is nudging me to share it again. For any situation, a potential future outcome can be one of three things – better, worse, or stay the same. If that is the case, ask yourself why do we focus on the worst potential outcome which accounts for only one third of the outcomes? Why are we not instead, focused on the majority two-thirds which are more positive and do not create worry? That simple illustration was a turning point for me in my worrier role. Each time since then when I start to fall into worry, I remind myself of the other two thirds and focus on those outcomes. As I recounted earlier, I consciously say “no” to that negative one third. Is this a strategy you can use to dissolve or set aside your worry?
A Lesson in Trust
Ultimately for me, worry has provided me the opportunity to develop trust in Spirit. My worries have always been out of love for the other person and fear of anything negative affecting them. Over the years I have learned that I can love and support them as they learn and grow without the burden of my worry. I have learned to trust that whatever is happening is part of the path they chose and is in their highest interest. I have learned that my greatest support for them is through my positive thoughts and beliefs and trust in that “the Universe has their back” just as it does mine. I have learned to trust their ability to make the choices that are right for them. AND I have learned to trust that everything happens on Divine timing. It is still a process though to undo decades of programming around worry. But it is now easier to recognize when I am starting to worry and then remind myself to let go of the negative one third and refocus on a beautiful outcome. I refuse to entertain the “what if’s: and stay in my heart sending love and light to the person I am worried about.
So, I have talked about releasing worry about another person but what about all the other things we worry about – complete strangers on the other side of the planet enduring the horrors of war, approaching weather events that are predicted to be destructive, health issues in another country that are portrayed as a threat to me and my family, or political will that could reduce my income, etc. Just as we learned with worry about a person, the same principles apply. Why focus your energy on a potential negative outcome that you are worried about? Why not focus on a turn towards the positive and invest your energy there? Trust that Source has a plan that is always in the best interest of all humanity, that we are unconditionally loved, even if we can’t see or feel that at times. Perhaps ask your angels and guides to help you release the worry and send positive healing energy to the situation.
The Choice is Yours
In the end, we all have freedom of choice so we can choose whether we will worry or not. Spirit just wants us to know that the choice to worry has “side effects” that we have just discussed. The most important thing when you are deciding to not worry, is to really surrender
that worry to Source. We can choose to be in the moment and see the beauty in our world and multiply it every successive moment. We can choose to step back and allow others to come into their power. We can choose to ask our angels and guides to release the worry. Lastly, we can choose to live from a heart centred place and put the worry created by the ego aside. Each time you make these decisions, the next time gets easier because you realize as Bobby McFerrin reminds us in his song, “…Don’t worry, it will soon pass, whatever it is…” So don’t worry! Be happy!
Sending you love and light,
Marilyn
Intuitive Counselling and Angel Card Readings
If you would like to receive some spiritual guidance specifically for you, I am offering intuitive counselling, angel card readings, and angel numerology readings online or in person (in Calgary).
Resources:
Authors
Mystical Membership - Archangels course by Radleigh Valentine
Websites
“Don’t Worry Be Happy” by Bobby McFerrin
Photo Sources
Photos by M. Young or created with Canva
Comments