This week Spirit wants us to think about family. They want us to think about what family means
to us and how family impacts our spiritual identity and growth. Do you have family? Who is part of YOUR family? How are your family relationships? What emotions does your family stir within you? Do you spend time with your family? What challenges has your family presented for you? How does family impact your identity? When you think of all these things and more that impact your life, can you believe that you chose the family to come into that would support your spiritual growth?
Defining YOUR Family
Who do you consider to be part of your family? The definition of family has greatly shifted over generations to mean much more than simply those related through birth or marriage. Although this definition is still valid “on paper” when involved in some legal, religious, or cultural events, the definition of family for most people comes from the heart. Deep down, I think most would consider family those who you share a deep bond with, a bond of mutual love and respect, of acceptance and trust, of compassion and familiarity. Family is not only there to help you up when you fall but also to let you fly free and watch you soar. When a
difference in values and beliefs comes up there is mutual respect, acceptance and even learning. There is a willingness to see each other’s perspective and a confidence that you don’t have to necessarily abandon your own. Family is there to hold you close as you release fear and sooth grief. It is there with an instant response to a call for help. It is there to celebrate with you and cheer you on to great success. Family knows who you are and believes in you. AND, as difficult as it may be, family is also there to present challenges that we can learn from. I know for me, the people who have these qualities above are not only my family by blood and marriage but also my family of friends. Who do you have in your family that fits this description?
All of us have more family beyond blood and friendship. Whether we acknowledge them or not, we have a loving family of Guides, Angels, passed loved ones, Ascended Masters, and others from the spiritual realm. Mother Earth, her creatures and deities are also part of our family. This entire “extended family” is providing you with endless unconditional love and support. Being unconditional, we do not have to “do” anything to earn their love and support. It is always there, ready and waiting for us – we just need to ask.
Parents and Ancestors
Let’s go back to the beginning for a moment … Biologically, we all have a mother and father if we simply define those roles as a source for an egg, a source for sperm, and a womb for those merged cells to gestate in. Some would say that beyond the biological events of conception, gestation and birth, that they have no mother and father - we will leave that discussion for a little later. Instead, let’s go back even before biology comes into play. Let’s pause for a moment to consider that, when you were still part of the ethers creating the plan for your current life, you chose souls who would incarnate as certain individuals to take on the role of your biological parents. You entered into a soul contract with them just as you entered into soul contracts with most people in your life. You chose not only to physically come from their biology but also to come from the lineage they carry. If it is hard to wrap your head around the fact that you planned your family, it may be even a bit more of a stretch to understand that you not only carry the genetic blueprint of your parents and ancestors, but you also carry their trauma and their wisdom through that blueprint. We chose this blueprint because it would afford us the type of existence we wanted to experience in the body on the planet at this time. Let’s see how those soul contracts and that blueprint plays out…
Relationships and our Growth
Our relationships with our parents and other members of our family greatly impact our spiritual journey. Our soul contracts with them are set up to help us learn the lessons we have chosen to learn this lifetime which help us grow spiritually. When we look at our relationship with family who we have a soul contract with, most start with our parents. Some of us may be so grateful to have had loving supportive parents by our side our entire life. Others may shake
their head in disbelief and question their choice of parents if they have experienced conflict, stress, neglect, or even abuse with them. And still others may feel the void of a lost relationship with parents. The role of parents and other significant adults present during our childhood, is pivotal in our development as children. They are our early teachers for how to navigate this world. They not only teach us how to physically survive, but they also impact the foundation of our values and beliefs. However, whether they are consistently present or not, loving and nurturing or not, is only one side of the coin in our development. Our resilience, our ability to learn is also influenced by what lessons we have chosen to work through in this lifetime. That is one reason why we see some people who have very similar experiences in childhood but one goes on to thrive as an adult while the other struggles.
Those closest to us often present the biggest challenges which teach us our greatest lessons. For example, when we have conflict or feel judged by any family member, it is usually very difficult not to strike back with our own judgemental actions or not to run and hide instead of standing up for ourselves. When we are stressed by repeatedly helping family avoid challenges or rescue them from their own trauma, it is often difficult to set healthy boundaries so both begin to learn the lesson of responsibility. When we wallow in disappointment and self pity versus demonstrating forgiveness of others and self. When we constantly give to the point of exhaustion, looking for acceptance and a sense of self worth, it is difficult to step back and feel worthy enough to receive. When we want to orchestrate everyone’s life to help keep them happy and safe, it is difficult to step back and focus on ourselves, giving them the opportunity to make their own choices in life and learn their lessons.
Our family members can also be great mentors for us. I know that when I am open and allow myself to enter a discussion without assumptions or judgement, I learn how to navigate a problem or take next steps in my journey simply by hearing and understanding a different perspective presented to me. We all carry the wisdom of our ancestors and our soul’s journey. The more we can dialogue with those who understand and care for us, the more deeply we can heal the generational trauma passed on to us and access that ancestral wisdom to learn and grow.
The Importance of Family
As we engage soul contracts to work through life lessons and learn from our family mentors, our new thoughts and beliefs can change our environment and therefor change our lives. Remember, what we believe, think, and feel manifests in our reality. Epigenetics tells us that our environment can affect the expression of genes. Therefor, that energetic environment that we create – perhaps one of joy and freedom versus trauma – can exert an epigenetic influence on our biological blueprint changing our DNA for future generations.
In order to progress on our journey by benefitting from our family interactions, especially those tougher ones, we must be willing to always keeping in mind “What am I to learn from this?” versus “Why is this happening to me?” We must be open to letting our family into our hearts, relating to each other at a heart level, away from the negative chatter of the ego, to benefit from all the wisdom that our experiences with family have to offer. As we work through the “trials and tribulations” of life with family, we must remember that we have freedom of choice. We can choose how we feel and behave with family. We may groan if we are facing an upcoming interaction where you anticipate there will be conflict – remember, don’t make assumptions. We may avoid interactions because we feel we are taken for granted or not valued. We can examine our perspective of any situation and determine whether we are choosing to respond with devotion or obligation, gratitude or resentment, love or fear, worry or celebration.
As we journey through life with our family, they help us develop a sense of who we truly are. As we let down our guard and begin to explore and express more of our spiritual selves, family reflects back what they “see” that reinforces our self concept or validates us. As we work with our human family AND our family of the Earth, we truly begin to understand and just “know” that we are all connected, that we are one. We can feel the trauma and strength of the Earth and her creatures. We can send healing to her and tap into her strengths. As we move into the identity of being “part of the one,” of understanding that we are all connected and that our beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and actions impact the Earth as well as other humans, we see our true identity. Can you see the profound influence of family on our lives?
In the Absence of Family
Despite our broader and yet deeper definition of family, some may still feel that they have none. Some may not feel any connection to other people, or to the Earth, or to Spirit. Whether these people feel a connection or not, there is one. No one is ever completely alone. That person may have chosen a journey of isolation on the physical plane and so do appear to be very alone with “no family.” Part of their journey may be to experience loneliness. This may be the prompt that they need to go within, to reconnect with their higher selves, to re-discover their true identity, perhaps to even tap into previously dormant spiritual gifts. If this sounds like you or someone you know, remember that you are part of the web or interconnectedness. Spend time in nature to feel that connection. Take in the beauty of the sight, sound, smell, and feel of the small, beautiful things around you. Imagine going deep within the planet to be held in the loving arms of Mother Earth. Allow yourself to feel the vibration of the Earth sending her love to you. You can also spend time at or in her waters to reconnect.
In the End
So, in summary, Spirit wants us to know that everyone on the planet has family. Family is
essential to our learning and growth along our spiritual path. Whether we feel abandoned or cherished, whether we are ignored or supported, our family has a purpose in supporting our spiritual growth. As we learn and grow, creating each precious moment of our reality, it is important to be grateful not only for the love and support from family but also for the challenges. As you evolve as a spiritual being it is comforting to know that you have some essence of family who, as Sister Sledge in the song We Are Family says, “Have faith in you and the things you do.”
Sending you love and light,
Marilyn
Intuitive Counselling and Angel Card Readings
If you would like to receive some spiritual guidance specifically for you, I am offering intuitive counselling, angel card readings, and angel numerology readings online or in person (in Calgary).
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